31 Thoughts You Have While Your Friend Is Getting Hit On

The cute ones always go for her.
It’s not her fault, but it’s also not okay.
No. I mean, it’s totally okay. It’s cool.
It’s not like it’s her fault.
Or that he’s that cute.
He’s got weird eyebrows.
Ha, like we haven’t all heard that pickup line before.
GOOD ONE, EYEBROWS.
Oh, he works in finance?
He probably has his own cubicle.
I bet he decorates his desk with those lame cat bobbleheads.
HA. CATS.
He’s probably a loser in real life.
Not that I hope he is.
I mean, if she’s actually interested, I want him to be great.
But he’s not her type.
Ohhhh, the fake phone number. Smart move.
He probably thought I have a boyfriend. That’s why he’s so focused on her.
I totally seem like the type of girl who has a boyfriend.
I’m the type of girl who men want to COMMIT to–right?
I’m focusing on me right now, anyway.
I totally wouldn’t have gone out with him even if he had talked to me.
So it’s a good thing he didn’t.
Am I going to be alone forever?
Note to self: you hate cats, no matter what your biological cat lady clock tells you.
Is there such a thing as a dog lady?
Even if there is, I won’t be one.
I’m totally not going to be alone forever.
My prince charming is just still being a frog right now.
Whatever, I’ll find him.
But first, can I just find that bottle of wine?

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