For most of us, it’s the same old vanilla sex every time your guy takes you home on a Saturday night. You clumsily walk up the familiar sticky stairs of his frat house, climb into bed and about twenty minutes later after putting up with dude sweat, overly entheastic touching, and staring at the posters on his wall, the game is over. He might say something along the lines of “wow” or “that was great” before kissing you goodnight (or giving you a pity high five if you’re like me) and rolling over to sleep. Anyone else get immediately pissed at this time of the night? At this point, I’m laying here orgasm-less and craving pizza. Why is it that he gets to ride the O-train every weekend, and you’re left with lady blue balls?
80 percent of all women have trouble reaching orgasm from penetration alone. You 20 percent? Fuck you. As for the rest of us unlucky ones, the only shot we have at reaching orgasm comes from the all mighty clitoris.
I’ve owned a vibrator since the 9th grade and have loved them ever since. Quick, easy, and you get a guaranteed orgasm. I had a few casual hookups in high school and just went through the motions of sex, never actually climaxing. I would always tell guys, “I’ve never come from sex” and they would get all full of themselves, puff up their patchy-haired chests and say something along the lines of “I can change that.”
Needless to say, none of these men came close to getting me there. When I somehow snatched up a serious boyfriend at the end of my senior year, I was determined to get mine just like he got his. One night, he came over to “watch a movie” (the Netflix and Chill before Netflix and Chill). We started making out immediately, tossed B-movie up on the TV, and had some pretty kinky sex. It was great, but still no O for ya girl. He turned to me after cleaning up with a strange look on his face.
“Why don’t you ever come?” he asked.
I sat there for a second trying to come up with a good reason. The only thing I could think of was the vibrator and how that’s the only way I orgasm.
“You’re willing to do anything to get me there?” I asked.
Not knowing what he was getting himself into, he responded immediately, “anything baby.”
With that I made him wait downstairs while I scampered up to my room. When I tiptoed back down, he sat there waiting like a little kid on Christmas morning.
“This,” I said opening my hand to show him the small vibrator. I don’t think he actually knew what it was, but like a perfect teacher’s pet, he was ready to learn.
That night was the first time I ever climaxed during sex. It was amazing being able to come at the same time as my man and brought us closer together. He not only loved that he could please me like I could him, but could also feel the vibrations as well, making his climax even stronger.
Ever since that experience, I try to use a vibe with at least the serious men I’m seeing/banging. I understand tequila-motivated one night stands are unexpected and probably not the best time to break out a new, scary toy to a stranger. But if you are in a relationship or consecutive hookup, what are you waiting for?.
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