Natalie Benson, former president of Chi Omega at Florida Gulf Coast University, is just like the rest of us. She wakes up every morning, checks her phone (probably), pees (I’m assuming), and goes about her day (one could reasonably conclude, but in truth, I don’t know her). And just like the rest of us, she sometimes takes a credit card that only loosely belongs to her, and charges way too much money to it, and hopes nobody will notice. Of course, when we do it, it’s to our dads, and the amounts usually rest just below the $580 in hopes that he doesn’t notice.
He always notices though.
And so did ole Natalie’s sorority sisters when $7,000 were mysteriously charged to the chapter credit card. Seven THOUSAND dollars. Listen, Nat. I’m not going to sit here and hound you about the legality and morality of what you did. Only God and standards can judge us, ya know? But what I want to know is HOW the fuck you spent $7,000. You live in a college town and go to college bars. You can buy five vodka sodas, three beers, and a round of shots for like twelve cents. I don’t know what else you could possibly need in college besides alcohol? Maybe clothes? The most I’ve ever spent in a sitting on clothing is $800, and I was honestly disgusted by myself. And I was also an adult. $7,000 is outrageous. And what’s more outrageous is that you somehow thought you wouldn’t get caught.
She did, however, get caught. The former president was called to a Personnel meeting, during which she admitted to misusing funds, before other exec members took the issue to UPD. I can only imagine how that meeting went:
Personnel Chair: Hi Natalie. Do you know why we brought you in today?
Natalie: Uhhh, because you forgot for a second who the fuck you’re dealing with? El presidente, bitches. I’m calling YOU up on Personnel for this disrespect.
PC: Close. It’s because there’s a $7,000 charge on the company’s credit card to Sephora.
Natalie: That was a PR purchase. Pretty girls are the happiest girls, ya know?
PC: I’m fairly certain the original quote is “happy girls are the prettiest girls,” but that’s neither here nor there. After some investigation on the parts of myself along with our treasurer, it seems within reason that the misappropriation of chapter funds is a direct result of your spending.
Natalie: Are you really asking me if I, PRESIDENT of Chi Omega, really spent $7,000 of the chapter’s money right now?
PC: In short, yes.
Natalie: Okay, well, yeah. I did that.
Probably went down exactly like that.
The meeting concluded with Benson agreeing to repay the chapter her debt, and later resigning as both president and a member. And again, Natalie responded how you do when your dad asks you to “pay him back.” She gave the chapter a cashier’s check for $580 (callback!) and then basically hoped they’d forget about it. She hasn’t paid any more money, and is refusing to do so. Classic!
The Florida Gulf Coast University Police Department continues to investigate this story..
[via Eagle News]
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Veronica Ruckh
Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co
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