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A Sigma Chi At UNF Branded A Pledge’s Ass With A Lighter And A Wire Hanger

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Everyone loves a good branding. Or do they love a good brandy? In any case, the University of North Florida’s Sigma Chi is currently under fire, because, well, because they branded a kid.

I know a fraternity gentleman or two — okay, exactly two — who have been branded. Neither of them were branded on the ass as far as I know, but they were branded well after their initiations as a symbol of their own idiocy devotion to their chapters. As Sigma Chi’s story is shaping up, one of their pledges similarly elected to brand himself with an undying symbol of his dedication to his fraternity. The 22-year-old active who branded him “joked” in an off-campus apartment about doing so with a wire hanger and a lighter — only it wasn’t a joke, because that’s what happened. Men have GOT to get a handle on what “just kidding” means. You can’t just be like “Babe, is that a cellulite dimple? Just kidding.” I know it’s there, so it’s not a joke. Ass. I digress. Let’s move the conversation back to a different ass — this 19-year-old pledge’s branded ass.

One thing led to another, and someone tattled on the active for branding the pledge, who has since admitted that he volunteered and was in no way coerced into his ass branding. While I think choosing self-mutilation in any way is stupid, if you choose it, you choose it. If you choose to get a tattoo, a painful process of self-mutilation, no one thinks twice. I think, in a way — in most ways, this is similar.

The situation is currently being investigated. The active may face charges, but the repercussions are currently undecided.

The lesson here, kiddies, is if you’re branding your pledge brother on the ass — if you’re doing anything to your pledge brother (or sister) in the ass — don’t tell anyone. Also, don’t do drugs. Probably.

[via The Florida Times Union]

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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