This weekend Amanda Bynes tried to hop on a plane to LAX with a dream and her (velour) cardigan, sweatpants, and oversized sunglasses. Obviously she was flying out of New Jersey. When in Rome, do as the Roman Americans do.
She entered the small Teterboro Airport terminal, where the only ID she presented was her suspended driver’s license, which, unsurprisingly, is not an acceptable form of ID. As she didn’t have another form of government-issued identification, the pilot would not let her board.
Outraged, Bynes shouted at the pilot “I’m Amanda Bynes!” and told him to GOOGLE her. Google me?! It’s one part power move, two parts entitled brat. Amanda, you weren’t even that famous when you were famous. Before you took a turn for the psychotic, you were a child star on Nickelodeon, which everyone knows is for kids who couldn’t make it on the Disney channel, then grew up to become a supporting actress in some bad movies.
Admittedly, I tried something similar at my favorite beach bar, my junior year of college, claiming that if they really needed a second form of photo ID, I’d be happy to pull up my Facebook profile. As you can imagine, neither Facebook, nor Google served as acceptable forms of ID. The pilot and jet rep refused to let Bynes fly, regardless of her fame. I simply adore when people pull the authority cards on celebrities.
I’m sure we’ll read a “longer tweet” about it soon:
“Can you believe it? Those ugly-faced pilots are such assholes! They are telling lies! They are saying that I need to follow the same rules as everyone else and they totally pretended not to know me! ME! The former All That star! This is all because the ugly editors at ugly magazines keep putting up old pictures of me so they didn’t recognize me! I don’t even look like that any more! I got so much plastic surgery, and dyed my hair blonder, and pierced my cheeks, and shaved part of my head, because I’m emulating the stripper Blac Chyna! These ugly idiots can’t even recognize a star when they see one! I’m suing all of their ugly faces, but not because I need the money! I’m so rich and pretty! I just want everyone to stop mistreating me!”
At least I hope we do.
[via TMZ]
Image via Associated Press
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Veronica Ruckh
Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co
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