You type in his name in the search bar. That is the search bar, right? You don’t want to update your status with your high school boyfriend’s name. No, it’s definitely the search bar. Your heart is pounding as you scroll through his timeline. You reach the month you broke up. The anniversary you had together. The vacation you spent together.
For some reason, stalking exes is one of our absolute favorite pastimes. Sure, it’s painful, unnecessary, and is most likely causing us severe psychological damage, but that hasn’t, and wont, stop us. We love the rush it gives us. We love knowing what these people are doing. We love confirming that our lives are better than theirs (because honestly, how could their lives be good without us?). Sure, it’s messed up, but we just can’t stop comparing ourselves to their new partners, passive-aggressively liking their statuses, and recalling just how amazing (or amazingly horrible) our relationships with them were.
Some creepy geniuses out there have decided to create an app to help us live vicariously though our “in a relationship” selves. It’s (ironically) called “Shryne” and it literally creates digital shrines of our exes.
Basically it takes photos, messages, posts, texts, so on and so forth to create a personal little feed for you to scroll through and cry over. Some people like to get over a relationship by actually getting over it. Other people like to get over a relationship by obsessing about it forever and hate-stalking the shit out of their exes. So for everyone who gravitates towards the second option (all of us), this is for you. It’s completely private, completely psychotic, and completely necessary.
I mean, it’s better than having an actual shrine of him in your room using his old sweatshirt, ancient love letters, and a used tissue. Right? Now we can secretly obsess over them without looking like the freaks that we really are. Finally someone gets us..