What’s not to love about Chrissy Teigen? She’s hilarious, beautiful, successful in both work and relationships, loved by many (including people who don’t even know her, aka me), and seems to have the perfect life. The American dream. But the world is about to realize that simply is not true, as Chrissy opened up to Glamour Magazine about her struggles with postpartum depression. We all know her as the happiest girl in the world with the perfect sense of humor, perfect body, and perfect family, but it goes to show that you can have everything in the world and still be facing a constant battle within yourself.
Chrissy writes:
“I had everything I needed to be happy. And yet, for much of the last year, I felt unhappy. What basically everyone around me—but me—knew up until December was this: I have postpartum depression. How can I feel this way when everything is so great? I’ve had a hard time coming to terms with that, and I hesitated to even talk about this, as everything becomes such a “thing.””
She continues to share her deepest struggles when she had to start going back to work.
“I was different than before. Getting out of bed to get to set on time was painful. My lower back throbbed; my shoulders—even my wrists—hurt. I didn’t have an appetite. I would go two days without a bite of food, and you know how big of a deal food is for me. One thing that really got me was just how short I was with people.
I couldn’t figure out why I was so unhappy. I blamed it on being tired and possibly growing out of the role: “Maybe I’m just not a goofy person anymore. Maybe I’m just supposed to be a mom.
Before, when I entered a room I had a presence: head high, shoulders back, big smile. Suddenly I had become this person whose shoulders would cower underneath her chin. I would keep my hands on my belly and try to make myself as small as possible.
During that time my bones hurt to the core. I had to go to the hospital; the back pain was so overwhelming. I felt like I was in an episode of Grey’s Anatomy…. I wondered: Am I making this all up? Is this pain even real anymore?”
She also recalls the moment she realized she had Postpartum Depression.
“Before the holidays I went to my GP for a physical. John sat next to me. I looked at my doctor, and my eyes welled up because I was so tired of being in pain. Of sleeping on the couch. Of waking up throughout the night. Of throwing up. Of taking things out on the wrong people. Of not enjoying life. Of not seeing my friends. Of not having the energy to take my baby for a stroll. My doctor pulled out a book and started listing symptoms. And I was like, “Yep, yep, yep.” I got my diagnosis: postpartum depression and anxiety.”
“I’m speaking up now because I want people to know it can happen to anybody and I don’t want people who have it to feel embarrassed or to feel alone. I also don’t want to pretend like I know everything about postpartum depression, because it can be different for everybody. But one thing I do know is that—for me—just merely being open about it helps. This has become my open letter.”
Chrissy ends the letter in the most adorable way possible.
“Phew! I’ve hated hiding this from you.
XX, Chrissy”
I think there is something we can all take away from this very open and honest letter. That things are never as they seem, and even the strongest, most successful people, sometimes, are weak. The more often that people in elevated platforms speak out, the more often other people can receive help and comfort. Another round of applause for Chrissy being an angel to walk the Earth..
[via Glamour]
Image via Shutterstock
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