Don’t Put Up With Shitty Friends


I’m not one to hide the fact that I made some pretty questionable decisions in college. Each weekend was like a new episode of a TV series that got progressively more crazy as the series went on. I thought I would calm down as senior year came, but that was the worst one yet. That being said, I don’t regret any of the decisions I made Thursday-Sunday. They were good experiences that I either learned from or will embarrass my grandkids with some day. Nope, my biggest regret from school wasn’t my choices on the weekend, but my choices on weekdays.

Who you choose to spend your time with says a lot and I made the coherent, sober decision to spend mine with some life-sucking, egotistical bitches. Boy, how I wish I could go back and slap myself in the face for doing so. When you first start college, you’re more vulnerable to making shitty friends. Your friendships are purely circumstantial. You’re desperate for a connection with someone and any random girl will do. Your standards start as low as someone who will zip up the back of your dress before a night out and that’s okay. But by the time sophomore and junior years roll around, your standards for a friend better have increased. This is where I fucked up entirely.

I was still putting in effort with friendships where the other party was only good for zipping up a dress. I found myself in friendships that gave me nothing of value. Some that even made my life worse and I didn’t recognize it for years on end. I would sacrifice for these people that would think twice about doing the same for me and that’s not a good friendship to have. At the end of the day, I felt physically drained from these unbalanced relationships. I wish I would’ve ended them so much sooner.

There are plenty of reasons a friendship is just not worth your time. If you recognize it, do something about it. Making the proactive decision to remove someone from your life is damn hard, but so worth it. Sure, it’s awkward. You see them in the library and have no idea what facial expression to make when your eyes lock. You hear the mention of their name and don’t know what to say. But it’s so worth the awkward transition phase to move on to bigger and better things.

All I’m saying is you’re worth a lot more than canceled hangouts and unanswered calls. Friendships are a two-way street and you should never be putting in all the effort. No matter how long the friendship or how good it used to be, there’s no shame in moving on from someone that just brings you down. The relationships you have that are worth putting the time into will flourish with your newfound time for them. It’s better to have a few great friendships than a million poor ones. Quality over quantity. The same goes for vodka shots. Thank me later.

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Blackout_B (@b_m4rie) enjoys drinking beer by the gallon and making memories she'll never actually remember. When she isn't embarrassing herself by making out with randos on the dance floor, you can find her pretending it's normal to drink a glass of wine with breakfast every day. It's fun to sit down with her on Sunday mornings and hear how fucked up her weekend was.

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