Big/Little Week is perhaps one of the most iconic experiences in a new member’s first semester in her sorority. To this day, I remember it as one of the most exciting times. You come home every day to treats, and gifts, and surprises. It’s like having a secret admirer, except she’s a girl and she exists solely to make the next four years some of the most incredible of your life. You feel special. You feel loved. You feel like a real, live, bonafide sorority girl.
Naturally, when a year passes by, you are eager to find a little one and bestow upon her the same sorority magic that your big passed on to you. You can’t contain your excitement for Big/Little Week. Little do you know, though, Big/Little Week from the big’s perspective is not quite the walk in the park you expect it to be.
Getting Into Her Dorm
Expectation: People are walking in and out of the dorms constantly on their way to class, the dining hall, and extracurricular activities. You’ll just slip on in behind some unsuspecting freshman, no questions asked. Her roommate is obviously just as sweet and wonderful as she is. She’ll welcome you into their shared space with open arms. You’ll chat and exchange tales about your little and begin to form a friendship of your own.
Reality: How many effing locks do they need for one dorm room? A campus keypad, building keypad, hall keypad, and a room lock just seem unnecessary. And why is it that the only person who has entered the building in the last twenty minutes went to C Hall when you needed to get to D Hall. When you finally get up to her room, you’re quickly reminded that freshmen don’t get to pick their roommates and your little is stuck with a hippie GDI who glares at you every time you step over to her side of the room. She’s disgusted by the offensive amounts of glitter and sequins you’ve brought with you and one foul step may lead to her calling in the RA.
Surprising Her
Expectation: Your false clues are clutch and you will easily be able to derail her beliefs that you and she are meant to be. I mean, hello, you dropped a strong hint that you were blonde and you’re brunette. You are so in the clear.
Reality: Littles talk. Because your little is such a social butterfly, she talks a lot, and God dammit, together the new pledge class has pieced together the fact that you girls are giving them false clues. Pledge momma Dawn, of course, can’t keep a straight face when they ask her about the bigs’ propensity for lying during Big/Little Week. Crap. She’s onto you.
Help From Your Big
Expectation: Your big knows how hard this will be and she’s so excited for the new addition to your family. No way will she let you go through this on your own. She won’t leave your side for a moment this week.
Reality: Your big is a junior. She and all of her friends just turned 21. With her newfound freedom to legally get belligerent, she’s spending every free moment at the bar. When you finally get ahold of her, she agrees to help you decorate, but she’s so drunk that she’s essentially useless.
Cooperation From Boys
Expectation: You will easily be able to convince the boys in your life to help you out with deliveries, serenades, and kidnappings all week long. This is pretty much an integral part of Greek life, and they’d be fools not to want to be involved.
Reality: Boys don’t care about Big/Little Week. Never in history has a boy cared about Big/Little Week. You will be able to manipulate a few of them — probably just the one(s) you’re sleeping with, though. If you’re lucky, your hookup buddies will offer up their pledges to help you out.
Decorating
Expectation: You have all your materials laid out neatly in your house, so throwing them together should be a piece of cake. You should be in and out in 45 minutes. Besides, decorating is fun, so this should be a great experience.
Reality: Between attempting to pull off any of your pranks, getting your setups to look just right, and getting distracted by the photos printed out and sticky tacked to her cinderblock walls, you will be in an anxiety-riddled race against the clock decorating her room each day. Top that off with having literally no place to hang anything from and running out of tape, and you’re in for a real nightmare. Two minutes left. Do you risk running into your little one or forego the Instagram picture of all your hard work? Decisions, decisions.
Making It A BFF Effort
Expectation: You and your best friend do everything together, and Big/Little Week will be no different. She’ll come decorate your little’s room with you and then you’ll go decorate her little’s room with her. You’ll giggle, and bounce creative energy off one another. It’ll practically be a movie montage.
Reality: After the first day, during which you made this a joint effort, you realize there is no time to do this thing twice. With all the coordinating with your little, and her roommate, and the boys you need to help you out, there isn’t a spare minute to make this a significant moment in your best friendship. Sionara, bestie, because you might as well not even exist this week. Unless you have a close GDI friend to recruit as a helper, you are on your own.
Passing Down Memorabilia
Expectation: You know this will be a costly endeavor, but hello, it will be way easier because you’ll be passing down half of the stuff you give to your little. Pass-downs are half the fun. Who doesn’t want to wear a rush shirt from the ‘90s.
Reality: But…but…you also love that rush shirt from the ‘90s. If you think cleaning out your closet is hard, deciding what to pass down is even harder. You’ll decide upon getting rid of the ugliest stuff, then feel guilty that you’re giving your little ugly stuff. A moral dilemma, but like, that shirt would look better on you anyway.
Crafting
Expectation: You’ve known about this week, like, forever, so you will obviously be perfectly prepared with a million perfectly crafted posters, and frames, and trinkets for your little’s home.
Reality: IS THIS GOING TO BE DRY BY THE TIME I NEED TO PUT IT IN HER HOUSE?! ALSO, I WANT TO KEEP IT. DOES THAT MAKE ME A BAD BIG?
Treats
Expectation: You are the Pinterest queen, and this is the perfect opportunity to bake the cutest themed cupcakes and treats for your little munchkin. Oh, munchkins! That’s a good idea. She needs munchkins.
Reality: Baking takes time, and of course it has to be done day of, because you’re not about to give your little old food. Your baked goods end up looking like shit, and you may have forgotten to add vanilla, because you were too busy scheduling her kidnapping to stay focused on what’s going on in your kitchen.
Your Apartment
Expectation: You have no expectations for your apartment. This is all going down at her apartment.
Reality: You are inhaling unhealthy amounts of glitter, your roommates are regularly making passive aggressive comments about how messy everything is, and thanks to a few paint stains, there is now a zero percent chance you get your security deposit back.
Big/Little Reveal
Expectation: It will all be worth it when she comes running into your arms and you’re finally united as big and little, officially.
Reality: It’s all worth it when she comes running into your arms and you’re finally united as big and little, officially..
Nice Move499
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Veronica Ruckh
Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co
@VeronicaRuckh
@VeronicaRuckh
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