Columns

TSM Fail Friday

Ten real submissions and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Wishing your bra size and grades were not the same letter.
–Florida

So something about you sucks either way…I get it.

It’s fine. I didn’t want an A anyway. TSM.
-Georgia

Yes, being smart is totally overrated.

As I’m on top I notice that all I’m wearing is my lavaliere. It is swinging back and forth and all i can think of is my sorority. I felt guilty, but that feeling didn’t last long. Sorry I’m not sorry. TSM.
-Anonymous

If you’re thinking about your sisters during sex…you’re doing it wrong…or he is.

Thinking of clever TSMs to submit instead of studying for finals. TSM.
-California

Oh yeah? Where? I’m DYING to read them.

Wearing a guy’s jacket while cuddling with another guy in a different guys bed. TSM.
-Texas

The fine line between srat move and slut move has been crossed once again.

Trying not to let one rip while peeing in a public bathroom. TSM
-Washington

I like…can’t even.

Waking up with a hickey on your neck and not knowing which boy gave it to you. TSM.
-Georgia

Boys don’t particularly LOVE hooking up with trashbags whose necks have been hoovered, so it was probably whoever was last. Just a hunch.

Recently we have had some issues with people clogging the toilets. If you clog the toilet please use the plunger and un-clog it. If it does not work then please tell Allie or myself. There is no need to be embarrassed because everybody poops (there is a book about it)
-Oregon

This is not the place to discuss your chapter’s bowel issues.

Having two breakfasts, two lunches, and two dinners. TSM.
-Tennessee

I’m either missing something, or you need to go on a diet.

I’m so crafty I make babies. TSM.
-Mississippi

Cool. You and the other trailer park hoes can have fun at Mommy and me.

Love,
TSM Intern

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