Fail Friday: The BEST Sorority Girl EVER

Ten real TSM submissions and four (but secretly kind of only like one so don’t get that excited) videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Sorry, shower shoes mess up my pedicure. Enjoy the athletes foot, bitch. TSM.

Foot fungus, however, goes great with a pair of peep toe wedges.

Did you cheat on me? Hope you enjoy my poop chip cookies. TSM.

Total Minny Jackson Move.

Using your hangover from Saturday night to vomit all over a GDI Sunday morning. TSM.

If anything other than vodka and grilled chicken caesar salad with dressing on the side is mixed into your bile, then this is NS. Otherwise, it’s acceptable.

Forrest Gump’s mom banging the principle of the school so her borderline mentally challenged son could be admitted. TSM
–North Carolina

I’ve got a hankering that you and Forrest Gump may have something in common, my dear.

I don’t spit or swallow. I save. TSM.

…And use it for the glue that holds together the shrine I built of my not-quite-fratdaddy. I then dress up the model in shack shirts I’ve acquired, and spend the night cuddling it and performing voodoo. On the seventh night of ritual, he will become my boyfriend. Works every time.

Blowing bubbles with his cum. TSM.

Like into the air? Or like with a curly straw like small children do with chocolate milk?

Getting realy super drunk TFM. but getting super high from smoking lots of pot. Because pots are in the kitchen. Duh. TSM
–South Carolina

I feel like murdering you.

A pledge failed to satisfy the sorority, so we all got around her and squirted into her face. TSM


Simultaneous orgasm…your sisterhood has reached a level mine has not. And I’m kind of okay with that.

The entire sorority automatically dislikes your family just because the president is in it. TSM

This must be how Barry O-bam’s family feels.

Went to my frat daddies house, I gave him dome while him and his brothers lifted my legs in the air and escorted me through the house and cheered us on. Then I got in trouble for smoking in the house. TSM
–North Carolina

Eww, you smoke? That’s trashy.

Here is a horrendous four-part tutorial for your viewing misery

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