Ten real TSM submissions and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
Misspelt sorority on our philanthropy’s poster. TSM.
-Oregon
“Please donate to mentally handicapped children, or the result is our moronic sister.”
If you’re gonna have one might as well have two. TSM.
-Alabama
Unless we’re talking about desserts, STDs, ugly girls to bid, or really almost anything else.
My big is a slut, but that’s okay. It’s why I preffed her. TSM.
-North Carolina
Why, so you could bond over how hard it was to grow up without a father?
Caffeine is for pussies, adderall is for frat stars. TSM
-District of Columbia
Yeah, betch!!! Lawlz at them Starbucks-drinking weak-sauced bitties. Go crush some addy up into your boyfriend’s muscle milk!
4 days, 3 gentlemen, 2 pledge classes, 1 fraternity, 0 regrets. TSM
-Texas
4 too many vodka crans, 3am, 2 potential fathers, 1 case of the clap, 0 respect.
Having a boyfriend but still keeping my options open. TSM.
-North Dakota
That’s the best way to set yourself up to get an ex-boyfriend while keeping your legs open.
Showing up to standards high… TSM.
-California
Not quite what people mean when they say to have high standards, but I guess this makes sense coming from California.
Becoming eskimo sisters with your sister. TSM.
-West Virginia
The only thing more sacred than the bond between sorority sisters is the bond between pole pals.
“We were hooking up in the room where his pledges were getting hazed.” TSM
-Pennsylvania
So watching you have sex is torture. Basically.
Wearing a white t-shirt I stole from a one night stand to initiation. TSM
-New Jersey
Thanks for the input, Snooks.
My hero <3
Love,
TSM Intern