If you’re reading this, chances are you’re in college. Or you were once in college. Or you wish you were still in college. And being in college, you probably did college-y things. Go to class looking like shit. Get drunk off of well liquor. And, of course, hook up with people. Maybe all you did was kiss. Maybe you had sex with every guy in every fraternity and made them wear dog collars. I don’t know. But chances are, what you did is very different than what your roommate did, your best friend did, and what your friends at other schools did.
So New York Magazine decided to do some digging and find the good, the bad, and the ugly in “the hook up generation.”
Ready for a fucking plot twist? We’re not the most crazy-sexual generation. According to the series (which is a combination of accounts from student photographers from around the country who are documenting their experiences), our generation isn’t the most horny. Or the most “free.” Or the most slutty. Hear that, mom? Looking over the fact that out of 700 students polled, 40 percent were virgins, the rest of the people were all over the place in what they do, and don’t do, at college.
From New York Magazine:
A decade ago, for a progressive college student to break ranks and say anything negative about hookups — that they could be used to reinforce gender imbalances, that it’s hard to shut down emotions, that sometimes they just felt shitty — meant she (or he) was aligning with the out-of-touch tsk-tsking adults. Now it’s fine for a forward-thinking college student to admit she finds the ritual “problematic,” to use a current-favorite campus term. Still — whether because of hormones, the impossibility of moving backward, the difficulty of making sense of your own feelings (let alone another person’s) at that age, the fear of being left behind — even those students who had rejected hookup culture for themselves wouldn’t go so far as to say that the entire system was flawed.
Some of what we learned was unexpected: It appears to be the case that, faced with either hookups or nothing, many students are simply opting out of college sex. Nearly 40 percent of the respondents to our poll were virgins. For some, it’s simply too disheartening to imagine your first sexual milestones achieved with someone whom you don’t know well (the problem with “backwards dating,” as one person calls it). Perhaps, too, there are fears at play: Both men and women said “rejection” was their greatest sexual fear; but for women, that is followed closely by “coercion.” But the general feeling among virgins and nonvirgins alike was that they were having less sex than their friends.
So what about you? Do you embrace the hook up culture, or are you shying away from it — waiting for something special? Here’s part of the gallery that goes along with the story. Real students documenting their real experiences proving that there is no one “right way” to have sex in college.
Kids these days. To read more about college sexuality, and keep up with the series, click here. And in the meantime know that whatever your preference is, it’s probably totally weird and your friends can’t relate. Which is cool. Because otherwise what else would we inappropriately gossip about when we’re hungover at brunch and talking way too loudly?.
[via New York Magazine, Elite Daily]