Columns

I Refuse To Break It Off With My Fling Because Of Our Snapchat Streak

I Refuse To Break It Off With My Fling Because Of Our Snapchat Streak

I have always been obsessed with social media because it’s literally where you can talk to your friends without ever actually having to see them. It’s also where you can use your best investigative skills to find out garbage about people you like, hate, and want to fuck. The internet has without a doubt always been my best friend and best resource. I thought I liked Instagram the best but I’m going to be perfectly honest I think Snapchat takes the gold medal.

First and foremost, literally nothing saves on Snapchat which is glorious for many reasons. It’s the perfect place to send all of my nudes, not like I actually care if they ever leak because they are absolute masterpieces. But still, I can give the worst kind of people my tit pics without having to trust them at all. I’m also a big fan of the idea of a quick and funny story because it really challenges you not to suck.

But my favorite aspect is the “streak” feature, which I know seems pretty trivial and stupid, but in reality it’s pretty great because you can literally track how often someone is paying attention to you…and yes my ego is that big. Not to mention I really do enjoy that cute little fire emoji next to all of my friends’ names. The longest snap streak I have ever had is 47 days and that is with my current fling. But here’s the real issue: he’s boring af.

In reality, I’d love to break it off with him. He’s exactly alright. Has a good job, a nice house, and cute dogs. But other than that? I may as well be making out with a bag of bricks because he has nothing interesting to offer to the conversation. It seems really easy right? Break it off. Find another who will at least keep me on my toes. But no. I cannot. And you know why? I want that 100 day Snap streak.

I never considered myself to be a shallow or stupid person but I think this kind of proves it. I want that 100-day commitment. I tried to ghost him the other day because I was bored. But I couldn’t not snap him. I’m halfway there, baby, and I am not giving up until that “100” emoji is next to his name. I could ideally start it with another friend, but my patience is non-existent and I keep reminding myself: I’m getting laid while my eyes are also on the prize.

Am I garbage? Absolutely. Does this guy have a Snapchat shelf life? Possibly. But you know what? When I have a goal in mind I will do anything to accomplish it. I am not a quitter. And if that means 100 days of dick picks I am a slave to the game, baby.

Email this to a friend

boybye

If I can't be buried with my dick pics then I don't wanna die.

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

New Stories

Load More