Everyone wants to be the relatable character in their favorite shows. Every girl imagines that she’s Carrie in Sex and the City when she’s really Miranda, or Blair from Gossip Girl when she’s really Vanessa. Let’s face it, you’re not the comical Khloé of your family, you’re probably the Kylie (without the lip injections). But with a show like The Office, it’s hard to really pin yourself to one character. Just envision, the characters of The Office residing in a sorority house, instead of working at Dunder Mifflin. Of course looks-wise, it would be a stretch, but personality wise, they would fit right it.
Michael Scott
Michael is the girl on Exec who let the power get to her head. She seemed like a perfectly good candidate at the time of elections. Then she became a monster. Now she spews off nonsense at chapter or thinks she is singlehandedly responsible for the sorority’s success. She’ll give elaborate speeches that are mostly pointless, leaving the entire chapter more confused than before. She’s beyond full of herself, but under all of that (not fully merited) ego, she just wants to be loved. And despite all of the long-winded speeches, mandatory events that everyone hates, and strange team building activities, she really does want what’s best for the sorority — she just has a funny way of showing it.
Stanley
Stanley is the senior who just wants to graduate. She’s over the sorority culture and basically done with being told what to do. You can’t touch this girl. Do not mess with her, because you will get your ass handed to you. You can send her to standards, you can try and reprimand her, but she does not give a flying fuck. She will leave a chapter meeting if it goes too long. She will avoid events that she deems unnessecary. She will speak her mind when needed but for the most part, she’ll be on her phone in the back of the room, avoiding getting involved in the action. Just let her be and try not to get in her way.
Jim
Jim is the popular girl of the sorority. But she’s not just your typical popular girl. She’s the girl you can’t help but like. Not only is she down to earth, but she’s actually really funny. Everyone always laughs when she makes a joke at chapter and at Halloween she’s one of the few girls who actually goes with a humorous costume over a slutty one, and manages to pull it off flawlessly. She’s effortlessly pretty, which makes her that much more attractive. You can’t decide if you want to be friends with her or BE her. Hello, girl crush.
Pam
Pam is the stereotypical cute girl of the sorority. Everyone loves Pam, but you’re not really sure why. She literally always has a boyfriend and they always win best couple at formal. You don’t really see the appeal, but maybe you’re just jealous. She’s not the smartest or the prettiest, she’s just kind of average. But, she has that girl-next-door factor everyone loves. Sometimes she annoys you, but for the most part, she’s cool. She has the in with some guys (big plus), and when her bitchy streak comes out, that’s when you know for sure that you’re sisters.
Creed
Creed is the wild card of the sorority. You’re never really sure what this girl is up to or how she managed to get a bid. She basically lives at standards, but at the same time you have a feeling that she’s gotten away with much more than she’s been caught for. She’s been in a charge of a few things here and there but for the most part, she can be found hanging out with strange frats and getting high in her car. The few times you bond with her, she ends up saying something strange and makes you wonder, yet again, how you’re sisters. Also, you’re pretty sure she’s been arrested or been sent to jail, but you can’t prove anything. Yet.
Kelly
Kelly is your typical, stereotypical sorority girl. She is the one wearing Lilly from head-to-toe and can be seen throwing what she knows in all her pictures. She is way too enthusiastic about everything Greek related. Need someone to bake for a frat? She’s in. Want to pick out costumes for DM? She’s on it. Need a girl to head up social media? Done and done. While she’s helpful in things she enjoys, you’ll have to threaten her with extra service to get her to do anything else. And even though she can never seem to shut up, she knows all the gossip about every frat and sorority. Who slept with whom? Who got sent to standards last? Which frat is about to be kicked off? She’s basically the real-life Gossip Girl. You love to hate this girl or you hate to love this girl, but either way, you can’t deny — chick’s got spunk.
Kevin
Kevin is the washed up senior. She’s the girl who can be found in the corner of the party eating cheese balls. She never really knows what’s going on in the sorority or really life in general. She rarely comes to chapter and when she does she’s completely out of the loop or spewing off strange ideas that people sometimes take seriously. Her ideal Friday night revolves around Netflix and Ben and Jerry’s. It’s okay, though. Despite her annoying habits and vapid personality, she’s always down for drunk eating and talking shit, which makes her good in your book.
Ryan
Ugh Ryan. What a shitshow. If there’s one person in your chapter who pisses you off, it’s a Ryan. When she joined as a PNM she had so much potential. After getting a leadership position, however, she let the power get to her head. As the years passed, her drive for helping the chapter fizzled out, but her head kept getting bigger. She’s the sister who acts like she knows everything, even though most of the shit she says is made up. She’ll throw you under the bus if it helps her stay out of trouble, and is always the first to blame someone else for the chapter’s downfall. Despite her bitchy attitude and cocky persona, she usually has a decent hookup for drugs and knows how to dress. If she didn’t keep taking her hot boyfriend for granted you could maybe like her. Maybe.
Andy
Andy is the girl who has been gunning for an exec position since Bid Day, yet somehow has never gotten elected. She has been secretly campaigning every chance she’s gotten, but everyone can see through her blatantly obvious scheming. She’ll mention her high school GPA and her incredibly hard major any chance she gets. Despite her desire to lead, she doesn’t seem to have it all together. She can’t keep her love life together, let alone the few small tasks she has within the chapter. Eventually she’ll get the message and set her sights on a new goal, but of course, that’s when she’ll get nominated. Funny how that works.
So no matter which character you are, just remember: every sisterhood, and office, needs them all. Except maybe a Ryan. Screw Ryan..
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drunk and confused
On an average day you can find me awkwardly asking to pet dogs, searching through frat houses to find my missing wallet, and sending apology texts to the innocent victims from the evening before. Still navigating my way through undergrad life, and enjoying every drunken and confusing second of it
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