If You Wear A Hair Tie On Your Wrist, It Will Actually Try To Kill You

Hair Tie

“I hate you” it thought to itself, as it once again put up with your bullshit.

It was only a matter of time, really. You had to see this coming. I mean, a relationship is about give and take. And yet you, you selfish little basic bitch didn’t care. For weeks, months, hell, maybe even years, all you did was take. And take. And take. When you were at the gym, in bed, cleaning, showering, in the wind, in the rain, feeling ugly, feeling pretty, really drunk or too hungover. You took everything it had. And once the relationship was broken? You’d replace it in a second.

That’s right. You’ve been a total bitch to your hair ties. And now? They’re fighting back.

According to Elite Daily, wearing a hair tie on your wrist can actually kill you, because of course it can.

Audree Kopp, a normal girl who wears a hair tie on her wrist like a normal person found out something very alarming. That little piece of elastic is actually an angry, bitter, neglected spouse, and it’s going to make sure you notice it (insert menacing music here). Here’s the really alarming, somewhat graphic in a “I can’t look away but also I might throw up” kind of way, video explaining the whole thing.

Yeah. It ain’t pretty. But I have to ask, what on Earth was she doing wearing a glittery hair tie? I mean sure. Glitter is great for crafts and casual, afternoon blowing for a recruitment video. But on a hair tie that looks suspiciously like a scrunchie mixed with a piece of ribbon? Ehhhh I don’t know, girl. I gotta say Audree, you had it coming. But hey, at least you’ve now learned a valuable lesson we all learned a long time ago thanks to Carrie Bradshaw:

No women [who works at W-magazine and lives on Perry Street] would be caught dead at a hip downtown restaurant wearing a scrunchie!

Be that a lesson to all of us. It’s classic, understated hair ties or die. Literally.

[via Elite Daily]

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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