I’m pretty indifferent when it comes to strip clubs. I mean, I obviously think they’re gross and I don’t feel any specific inclination to go to one, but it’s unrealistic for me to think my boyfriend feels the same way. Guys are disgusting and perpetually horny and for some reason turned on by the idea of a half naked stranger shaking her ass around for cash. I don’t see the appeal, but I also don’t have a penis and a fat stack of singles, so I won’t pretend to be an expert on the subject.
One topic I can definitely shed some light on, however, is jealousy. Every woman in the history of time has experienced a healthy serving of jealousy, and if you meet a girl who claims she hasn’t, that bitch is lying to you. It’s in our biology to want to defend our territory, and when I say territory, I’m talking about that Brooks Brothers-clad six-footer you can’t get enough of. You’d do anything for that scruffy piece of shit. And yes, that includes opening a can of whoop ass on a stripper.
Okay, so maybe she wasn’t exactly a hero coming to his rescue. He was clearly having a good time, even though he pretended to be reluctant to get on that chair. My question is, who thinks it’s a good idea to take their boyfriend to a strip club if they’re that protective? She probably should have either A) begged him not to go in the first place or B) stayed home in blissful ignorance, telling herself that he’s currently at a bible study. This reaction, while entertaining, was probably not her best move. I’m guessing she got kicked out, but that’s nothing compared to the hell she most likely unleashed on him when they got home. Let’s all send some positive thoughts towards the world’s most unlucky boyfriend. And to the stripper his girlfriend knocked on her ass..
[via Elite Daily]
Image via YouTube
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Lucky Jo
Lucky Jo is a former and current TSM writer who likes her men how she likes her coffee: way too hot and unforgivably bitter. She graduated from the University of Missouri in 2016, proving that C's do in fact get degrees. She now spends her days working for a social media marketing agency, hiking with her dachshund, and trying to bring back the scrunchie. Hate mail and goat memes can be sent to lucyjmulvihill@gmail.com.
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