Kate Upton Experienced Self-Loathing After Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover

Most people would think that a well-marbled and/or gorgeous girl such as Kate Upton would be supremely confident with herself and feel the greatest sense of pride after she and her tits graced the cover of Sports Illustrated’s Swimsuit Edition in 2012. While most cover girls celebrate their print modeling success, Kate told Elle magazine she, “felt terrible,” about herself.


Apparently, after her cover issue, every guy Kate met, “was either married or about to be married, and I felt like I was their bachelor present or something.” She went on to say, “I’m not a toy, I’m a human. I’m not here to be used. I’m a grown woman.” Sick of being treated like a dumb blonde, Upton complained about the way models are treated, and how she’s sick of being laughed at for wearing a cross around her neck. Upton’s shocked anyone could think for a moment the girl who posed topless and covered only in body paint could be anything but a devout Christian.

I’m not sure if Kate is expecting sympathy, but she certainly won’t find any here. Listen Kate, the last thing you should feel is terrible about yourself after becoming a cover model. Stop fishing for compliments. There are rednecks in the world who hold you to be a physically attractive individual, and you need to own it before your next 30 pounds hit you. You’re a model for fuck’s sake, of course people are valuing you for your appearance. You’re not getting paid to be a keynote speaker at a metaphysics convention, you’re literally getting paid to pose topless. You’re the one who chose this career. You weren’t held up at gun point and forced to show the world your “curvy” self. Get the fuck over it.

I might have a slight twinge of sympathy for you if you were recovering from an eating disorder and blaming the pressures of the fashion industry, but you’re not a fashion model and you’re far from sample size, so there’s no validity to that claim whatsoever. You’re the one who cat daddy’d in a bikini, and you’re the “Good Christian Girl” who let her tits be seen by people world wide.

I think it’s safe to say that the way people perceive you comes largely from the way you present yourself. That’s recruitment basics 101. If you don’t want your house to SEEM like a group of crazy sluts, don’t ACT or DRESS like a group of crazy sluts. I don’t understand why the fuck Kate’s expecting sympathy from readers of a fashion magazine for models. There are millions of beautiful girls in America who are dying to be objectified, and if she has a problem with it, I can think of a million people who would take her place and NOT bite the hand that fed them.

On the other hand, I totally understand the “terrible” feeling of self-loathing associated with making regrettable decisions. I remember, back when I had a conscience, I felt “terrible” after making out with Ben Cohen, letting him touch my boobs, and giving him a handjob at summer camp. The good news was, I got the fuck over it, realized that life goes on, and got back on the handjob saddle before September came around, much to the delight of any boy who accompanied me under the bleachers after cheerleading practice.

Perhaps the “Good Christian Girl” Upton is having feelings of regret after posing nearly naked, becoming a bikini-clad YouTube sensation, and posing with a Coke (regular, not diet, NS) bottle in her cleavage and is finally coming to terms with the daddy issues that brought her to where she is today.
It could be that, or it could be she’s on the verge of a downward spiral and is one line away from dating a rap star. I hope it’s A$AP Rocky. Either way, Kate wants everyone to pity her. Somehow, I can’t do it.

[via US Magazine]

Image via Mankind Unplugged


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