It’s summer and you’re hooking up with that mediocre boy from high school during halftimes and SportsCenter commercial breaks. As a girl who likes to be able to keep up with the boys, be they mediocre or not, I’m a proponent of education in the vast world of sports. It’s fun to surprise our better other halves with an adequate knowledge of what takes up so much of their time. Hot off the Miami Heat back-to-back championship, the debate of LeBron vs. Jordan is one that, when you really look at it, boils down to the catty politics of girls and sororities. So go ahead, impress him outside the kitchen and bedroom with a little sports talk. Here’s how it breaks down:
Drafted out of high school and ten years into his NBA career, LeBron James has four MVP trophies and a championship ring for each middle finger. To understand LeBron, we must compare him to the Queen B. Her seemingly smug attitude and physical wonder make her a favorite to bash on your school’s gossip websites, as is the case with LeBron. There’s no doubting that either of them are enviable, but they’ve garnered hatred for it. They’ve stepped on a lot of toes to get to the top. Some might judge a girl for turning her back on a bottom-tier house she’s a legacy to, in order to accept a bid to a top house. Similarly, people don’t like that LeBron left Cleveland when the more prominent team in Miami made an offer, but can you really blame either of them? Our girl is invited to every fraternity formal, and LeBron gets tons of offers. It’s usually just because someone wants to score, and both people are good for it. There are some people you just love to hate, and for most of America, LeBron is just that person.
Then there’s Michael Jordan. His alien-vanquishing slam dunks are admirable and he epitomizes working hard to achieve your dreams. We’ve all heard that he didn’t make his high school basketball team, but still went on to become one of the greatest NBA players of all times. In sorority terms, he’s the girl who made sweetheart with her good grades, good looks, and charm. We like them because we feel like they’re relatable, on a surface level anyway. Sure MJ has a a gambling scandal, some infidelity, and much younger wives under his belt, and that sweetheart is actually a total bitch who slept with a bunch of the brothers to get her title, the public chooses to ignore that because of how they present themselves. We still paint them as the picture of perfection, and there’s nothing that’s going to change that.
In the end, Jordan will always be America’s sweetheart, with the country wrapped around his finger. James will always be your classic bad bitch who talks a lot of shit, but can usually back it up, so he needs to own it. King James, in my opinion, is just as great a player as Jordan ever was. A little advice to LeBron: Haters gonna hate, so keep your head, standards, and vertical leap high.
- Image via Barber Shop Sports
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