Miley Cyrus Makes Me Want To Be A Better Woman

Miley Cyrus already has a ton of things I wish I had: an incredibly hot fiancé, millions of independently earned dollars, a mansion… need I go on? However, she does have one thing that I wouldn’t need a genie to be able to attain: her new pilates body. I don’t know about y’all, but my Pinterest ‘thinspiration’ board is absolutely covered with equal parts fitness models and obese women, but none of my pins have motivated me to get my ass to the gym like Miley. Sure she’s not the most talented celebrity, nor would I ever add her to my very exclusive list of women who inspire me (Sandra Day O’Conner, Jackie O, Margaret Thatcher, etc), but I think her physical transformation is inspiring in its ‘every woman’ appeal. There was really nothing wrong with how Miley looked a few months ago, I never thought she looked fat or that Liam deserved better. But then out of nowhere… WHAM! She shows up at The Hunger Games premiere looking fantastic.

Like most of the ladies on this website, I’ve never been overweight, so success stories of The Biggest Loser persuasion aren’t something I can relate to. They don’t really push me to quit watching True Blood and bump up my workout routine. On the opposite end of the spectrum, no matter how many pictures of Miranda Kerr I plaster on my bathroom mirror, after a month or two of dedication I start convincing myself that she was born with a certain perfection I can never obtain, so my will to try goes out the window. Miley made just a few adjustments to her lifestyle, and she already looks a million times better.

I currently maintain my ‘bod’ with the diet of a child laborer in a Taiwanese sweatshop, and thanks to Ms. Cyrus I’m going to add a new workout routine featuring the best plans Pinterest has to offer in the mix. Hopefully, my new relatable workout icon will keep me going for more than just a few months. Transformation pics may be posted if the trolls promise not to make any sort of comments involving butts and pee.*

  • *Ed. Note: That is literally impossible. – Bacon

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