If you’ve been cheated on (and I honestly hope you haven’t) then you know the truth: it might just be the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced. It’s an agony-filled, impossible to get over, mind-fuck of a situation and it. fucking. sucks. It sucks. That’s the only way I can put it. The person you loved more than anything went behind your back and screwed the slutty girl from his econ class even though he said you were his *forever.* Yeah, it’s pretty damn brutal. And when you’re standing in your room, hugging his t-shirts and reading every sweet text he ever sent you, you can’t help but wonder:
Why did this happen? What did you do wrong? When did he stop loving you? Over and over you ask him. Over and over you think it before falling asleep. Over and over you question: why did this happen to me? To us?
It turns out the answer could be as simple as this — you were on different pages, physically.
No, I don’t mean sex necessarily. What I mean is actual, physical closeness. In a new video by The School of Life, the psychology of why people cheat is broken down and it’s actually infuriating simple.
It isn’t necessarily because he didn’t love you. It’s not because he wasn’t attracted to you or because he was soOoOoooOoo horny. It’s because humans have two needs in a relationship: to have their own space, and to be together. And you both have different levels of those needs. Some people need more time together and physical closeness (aka being “clingy”) and other people need more time to themselves (aka being “cold”). Neither is right or wrong, it’s just a matter of figuring out what you both need, and being honest with each other about it.
Seems so easy to avoid something so painful. And hey, if that doesn’t work, maybe he was just a horrible piece of shit. Whatever. His loss..
[h/t Elite Daily]
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Rachel Varina
(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.
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