First off, I take exemption with The Hills: That Was Then, This Is Now special that aired last night on MTV being called a reunion because the only person that was on the show that was there was Lauren. Of course, she was the star, and it’s fine to give her her own retrospective, but I tuned in expecting to see Audrina, or Whitney, or even Jen Bunney, and when I got an hour of Lauren, her parents, and the show’s producers, it was a little bit of a letdown – not to mention that it was basically a 60-minute commercial for Conrad’s clothing line at Kohl’s. But even so, there were some secrets revealed, so let’s get to it.
1. All Of The Job Stuff Was Totes Rigged
Remember how nervous Lauren was when she interviewed for that internship at Teen Vogue? Well, even though she legit thought she was competing for the job, her dad pointed out in the special that obviously the gig was a lock – which she probably should have figured out when the interviewers were all miked, but sure. As one of the producers put it, “She literally thought she worked at Teen Vogue.”
2. She and Brody Had Zero Chemistry
Turns out, there was no spark between Lauren and Brody and their entire relationship was essentially manufactured by the show’s producers. In the special, Lauren discussed how after her breakup with Jason, she had no interest in dating, but the pressure for her to be in a relationship was so intense, she just let the showrunners make the relationship look like more than it was. Although, I don’t know how you wouldn’t want to get all up on this…
3. Lauren’s Husband Has Only Seen Her On The Hills Once
Of course, even though Brody wasn’t her jam, Lauren didn’t exactly get an uggo for a husband.
And it turns out, he’s only seen her on the show once. Unfortunately, it was not when she was at her best. As Conrad tells it, “We were at a hotel once and he was flipping channels and he was like, ‘Oh, it’s you!’ Of all scenes for him to pick, it was like, us in a club, and I flip around, and I’m like, ‘I’m at the Roosevelt pool every Saturday!’ William was like, ‘Nope!’ and changed the channel. ‘I don’t want to know that about you!’”
4. Kim Kardashian Was On The Hills One Time
And by one, I mean in one scene that ultimately was cut from the show, but still. A year before her sex tape dropped and started her career, the woman now known as Mrs. West showed up at Spencer and Heidi’s housewarming party (I assume with step-bro Brody?) and complimented their jellyfish aquarium. And people say Kim can’t act.
5. Lauren Refused To Hook Up With Randoms
On top of the no-go with Brody, Lauren revealed how producers would try to set her up with random dudes, and how she could always tell because they would come over wearing microphones. In turn, she would retaliate by refusing to kiss any of these dudes, even when the producers begged her to. In perhaps the best part of the whole show, we saw the rough footage of Lauren’s date with motorcycle dude in Paris, and then what actually aired. They fully displayed how easy it is to manipulate footage. I wonder if they did that on The Bachelorette…
6. There Was An Alternate Ending To The Show With Lauren
As anyone who watched the show’s finale knows, Lauren never showed up, which implied that the entire series was fake. But in the special, Lauren revealed that she had filmed an alternate ending to the show that MTV chose not to air. Now, that ending has been on YouTube for a few years, but this was the first I’d personally heard of it. In case you hadn’t either, here it is:
Truthfully, I would have preferred this ending. None of us are watching reality TV because we think it’s real, but being able to pretend that it is is definitely better than absolutely knowing that it’s not. .
Image via Youtube
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, and documenting her love of all things cheese related. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
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