Students Steal 3 Beers From A Fraternity And May Face Criminal Or Felony Burglary Charges, Because Frat

KDR House

How much does a case of Natty go for these days? Fifteen bucks? Is that somewhere close? I wouldn’t know, because I haven’t purchased beer in, like, my whole life, but $15 is what makes the math easiest for a girl like me who’s too pretty for math, a creative right brain genius, not very good with numbers. So, in theory, three cans of Natty Light should cost about $1.50.

You know what would be really frat, though? Spending $370 on three cans of beer instead.

So, that’s what two students at Penn State did. Last Thursday night, between 11:30 and midnight, two 21-year-old students–who can legally buy all the beer they want–kicked down a locked bedroom door in the Kappa Delta Rho house and stole exactly three beers from the room. Three beers. That’s not even enough for two men to enjoy. Also, noticing when even three beers are missing from your room. TFM.

Unfortunately for the hardened criminals, our boys are smarter than they look. Video surveillance of the house easily helped police identify the two students who stole the beers and caused $370 worth of damage to the house (the broken door). And now they may be facing criminal, or even felony, burglary charges. I hope your can and a half each of piss water was worth it.

The lesson, I suppose, is don’t fuck with KDR.

[via Onward State]

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at

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