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Target Just Started Selling Sex Toys, Is Seriously Now The Only Place You Need To Shop

Target Just Started Selling Sex Toys, Is Seriously Now The Only Place You Need To Shop

When I think of Target, I think of soccer moms, colorful throw pillows, and my dwindling bank account. What I don’t think about? Sex toys. Although that is soon to be a thing of the past.

Thanks to the ever-growing “Fifty Shades of Grey” popularity, Target has gotten in on the cash cow and come up with its own line of kinky movie-inspired sex toys. Items include a “Massage Me” candle (whatever the hell that is), massage oils (otherwise known as lube), blindfolds (for the closet freak), and a vibrating ring (for his penis). Are you searching the sky for flying pigs? Because I do believe that hell just froze over. Ladies and gentlemen: Target now sells cock rings.

While the major retailer claims that the items are being sold in the “adult health area” — which I guess is the polite way to say “where we store the condoms” — one news station found the sex toys in the kitchen area next to the blenders. Something tells me that’s not what E.L. James meant when she spoke of “whipping.”

Has the time we add “vibrator” underneath “milk and shampoo” on the grocery list finally arrived? I guess we’ll see how well this “Fifty Shades” line sells. But something tells me that running errands has forever changed for the better.

[via KTLA 5]

Image via ValeStock / Shutterstock

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Catie Warren

From Rush To Rehab (@catie__warren) is a semi-fuctioning adult who has been celebrating her 21st birthday for the past three years. She attended college in the nation’s capital and to this day is angry that Pit Bull lied to her, as you cannot, in fact, party on The White House lawn. Prior to her success with TSM, Rehab was most famous for being featured in her hometown newspaper regarding her 5th grade Science Fair Project for which she did not place. In her spare time, she enjoys attributing famous historical quotes to Marilyn Monroe and getting in fights with thirteen year olds on twitter. Email: catie@grandex.co

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