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The Official To Do List For Your BFF’s 21st Birthday

Birthday

Birthdays are already awesome, but 21st birthdays are the ultimate. The weight of the world is lifted of your shoulders and your weekend activities are no longer grounds for arrest (well, most of them). The only thing better than you turning 21 is having your best friend turn 21 and join the exclusive club we wait our entire teenage years to join. It has to be absolutely perfect. It’s a lot of pressure, but if you plan it right, you can throw the 21st birthday party that your princess of a best friend deserves.

Before the Party

Find A Location For The Party
If you can’t house the party yourself, ask other people that your best friend is also close to: sorority family members, other sisters, boy toys, etc. Might be obvious, but if you don’t have a place to have the party, then there won’t one at all.

Get Decorations
What’s a birthday without a birthday Instagram? Get number balloons, painted bottles, streamers, a bouncy castle, whatever the budget and space allows for. Just make it cute.

Make Her A Sign
Everyone within a 30 foot radius *must* know that it’s her birthday. A sash is not enough to get the message across that it’s her motherfucking 21st. Make a big glittery sign with that suits her personality. Extra points for signs with a bucket list on them. It makes the night even more exciting when you have an excuse to, say, kiss 21 strangers.

21

21 sign list

21 tsm

21 super bowl

21 america

If that’s not her style, get her a crown and a sash at the very least. She is the birthday princess.

Buy A Bottle Of Champagne
Not popping champagne on your 21st birthday should be considered a cardinal sin.

Plan An Itinerary
You don’t have to stick exactly to the plan, but just have an idea of where to go. Start at the stricter bars and end at the bars where everyone else will be. Know how you are going to get to and from the bars. Make sure that she has friends that can get into every bar.

Make A Facebook Event
Invite everyone who she has even made eye contact with and make sure to unload all of the hideous pictures and videos you have been hoarding on your phone as blackmail. Encourage your friends to do the same.

Bake A Cake
Just because this birthday is all about alcohol doesn’t mean you can ignore the best part of any party: CAKE. Decorate it with all of the sprinkles. Little pocket shots would be the perfect icing on the top of a perfect 21st cake (hehe).

During The Party

Take Pictures Before Guests Arrive
Get in a solid photo shoot with and of her before anyone else shows up. You can take as many as you want with all of the poses you can think of without the pressure of other people. Also, make sure to get a few options for her Instagram. Once people show up, she will be too distracted (and probably too drunk) to be able to take salvageable pictures.

Be On Door Duty
If your apartment is hard to get into, it’s your job to let people in. Let her enjoy the night without having to run in and out of her own party.

Keep An Eye On Things
You’re allowed to have fun, it is a party after all, but make sure that no one is actively trying to murder your best friend. You know her limit just as well as you know your own, so without nagging her, make sure she remembers to pace herself. Making it to the bars is the ultimate goal. While you’re at it, keep an eye on the guests. People can be animals.

Get Everyone To Sing Happy Birthday
Count down the seconds until midnight if that’s when her birthday starts, or do it early enough in the night that she can eat cake and fix her makeup in time to go to the bar. While everyone sings, take an obligatory snapchat of her chugging whatever she’s been drinking all night, preferably straight out of the bottle.

After The Party

Get Her Ass To The Bars
Put her shoes on, have someone lock up behind you, shove her into an Uber, and go to the bars. This her rebirth. She is being allowed into places that she has been sneaking into for the last few years. If she doesn’t go, then what was the point of those fake lashes and the sparkly romper? By any means necessary, take a picture of her handing her ID to the bouncer and let her dance the night away. And by dance, I mean move her body in a pseudo-rhythmic fashion.

Hold Her Shit
She is not in a position to be in charge of anything that contains any amount of worth. Phone, keys, ID, all of it will be under your care. She’s too busy telling every stranger she sees that it’s her birthday to be able to be responsible.

The Next Morning

Prepare For Her Monster Hangover Of A Lifetime
Have water, Gatorade, advil, and a bacon egg and cheese at the ready. When she finally regains consciousness, she will feel like she has been hit by a Mac truck. Slowly feed her food and water, and make sure there are plenty of hair ties around to hold her hair back when she inevitably blows chunks.

Fill In The Gaps
If she did it right, she’s not going to remember much. So as her best friend, you have to explain to her how you had to drag her out of the alley that the strange man she just met was trying to pull her into, despite her many attempts to convince you that she was fine and you were cock blocking her. Send her the pictures that you took of her and show her the snapstories that document her every move from all angles. She’ll get to enjoy the party for a second time.

Clean Up As ASAP As Possible
The longer you wait, the less likely you are to clean up. Grab trash bags and collect all of the cake plates and empty bottles that are strewn about before they start to smell. The mere sight of alcohol could be enough to cause dry heaves. Get the sticky stuff off of your floor and counters. You can wait to clean the bathroom until after she’s done ruining it. You’ll thank yourself later.

There you have it. The end all, be all guide to making sure your best friend has the best birthday. Show her how much you care by throwing her the party of a lifetime. She’ll have to return the favor eventually, and that makes it all worth it. I mean, knowing she had the best time makes it all worth it.

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Ali Hin

A born and raised Jersey girl, she can always be found covered in sand and pizza sauce. Her personal brand is "that girl." She prefers wine in bottles because she thinks outside of the box. Send fan mail to sratbroTSM@gmail.com or by smoke signal.

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