There’s no doubt that after a hard night of drinking, nothing feels more right than putting down some food. Sometimes the most difficult drunken decision you can make is exactly what food to eat. Here’s a helpful guide to alcohol’s perfect food sidekicks.
Beer And Pizza
This one was first because it’s painfully obvious. There’s just something about the combination of these two that is all that’s right with the world. Somehow the grease of the pizza and the bubbles of the beer infuse flawlessly together in your stomach. That is until you have one too many slices, and can no longer remove yourself from the couch. Two. Always stick with just two.
Margarita & Tacos
Again, another match made in heaven. The tequila gods knew upon the creation of their disastrous beverage that meat, cheese, and veggies wrapped in a tortilla would be the perfect partner in crime. The burning from the tequila is quickly masked by the soft, soothing tortilla and sour cream.
Vodka Soda & Fries
After spending your entire night careful of your calorie consumption, you’re now drunk enough to give it all up. Whether they’re fast food fries, or fries smothered in cheese, they are the perfect reward for being calorie conscious thus far. These little rods of potato will fill you with satisfaction at 2 AM, and regret at 11 AM.
Wine & Grilled Cheese
It’s basically the same thing as wine and cheese, right? The best scenario here is to get a drunken fraternity guy to make one of these for you. He thinks making you food is his one-way road to getting laid, but in reality gobble it up and run out the door. You’ll probably be throwing it up in seconds anyway.
Mimosas & Bagels
Just think of it as breakfast after hours. If you’ve been going at it with OJ and champagne (heavy on the champagne), what better combination than a bagel! It’s honestly a carb nightmare, but your drink is made from oranges, so it isn’t all that bad!
Vodka Cranberry & Mac and Cheese
No wait, hear me out on this first. Vodka crans are the most basic of basic drinks and mac and cheese is the most basic of basic college foods. I guess these two really aren’t a taste match, but hey, at least they have one thing in common.
Long Island Iced Tea & Burgers
A Long Island iced tea is an All-American staple, as is the burger. Not to mention the drink is almost 100% alcohol so a hearty sandwich to soak that all up is super important. For those of you lucky enough, you can get one of these at a burger joint open late-night, and it will be fresh and delicious. For those of you not-so-lucky, a Big Mac will have to suffice.
Jungle Juice & Ramen
Let’s face it. If you spent your whole night drinking jungle juice in a sticky basement, you probably don’t have that high of standards for your drink food either. Hit up the pantry and grab a package of the college staple food and throw it in the microwave. Just don’t drunkenly forget to add the water because that smoke will cause a lot of problems for the risk chair.
And in the worst case scenario, when you can’t get your drunken hands on any of this food, chug some water and go to bed. When you wake up in the morning starving, a bacon, egg, and cheese breakfast sandwich will definitely be calling your name. Just don’t forget the hashbrown..
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Blackout_B
Blackout_B (@b_m4rie) enjoys drinking beer by the gallon and making memories she'll never actually remember. When she isn't embarrassing herself by making out with randos on the dance floor, you can find her pretending it's normal to drink a glass of wine with breakfast every day. It's fun to sit down with her on Sunday mornings and hear how fucked up her weekend was.
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