- I haven’t slept with anyone all summer. I’m basically a virgin. TSM.
- When your 60-year-old alumnae tell you not to worry, because they were alcoholics too. TSM.
- My big tells me I’m pretty. TSM.
- Being told you’re not a “typical sorority girl” and feeling confused and offended, because you absolutely are. TSM.
- Deciding which underwear to wear based on who’s going to be there. TSM.
- “I preffed the shit out of her.” TSM.
- Me: *breathes*
Standards: There’s a Panhellenic rule against that. TSM.
- “Are you dressing cute, or no?” TSM.
- Being 19 and 21 at the same time. TSM.
- Vodka might not be the answer, but it’s always worth a shot. TSM.
- Haaaaave you met my little? TSM.
- Sisters never let sisters’ selfies go unliked. TSM.
- Feeling like high school you would be terrified of the new and improved college you. TSM.
- “We should have pregamed.” TSM.
- 1: “Do you workout?”
2: “I mean I sorority squat in like every picture.” TSTC.
- “YASSS” being an autocorrect suggestion in your phone. TSM.
- I didn’t pay for my friends. I paid for my Instagram likes. TSM.
- Knowing you’re over him when you stop checking to see if he watched your Snapchat story. TSM.
- “Can we go to Starbucks first?” TSM.
- “Save it and send it to me.” TSM.
- Frat queen, not trap queen. TSM.
- Preferring pre-law boys to pre-med boys, because it’s less schooling and more First Lady potential. TSM.
- I hope the earring I lost in his bed punctures him in his sleep. TSTC.
- Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because he was tall and in a good fraternity, and he’ll probably text you again at 2:34am this Saturday. TSM.
- God grant me the serenity to accept the grades I cannot change, courage to raise the grades I can, and wisdom to know the difference. TSM.
- Having more sorority t-shirts than college t-shirts. TSM.
- Buying the t-shirt even though you didn’t go to the event. TSM.
- Never Have I Ever basically just being a way to call out your friends on the embarrassing shit they’ve done. TSTC.
- Looking pretty. Getting shitty. TSM.
- Can I put “highly skilled at taking care of drunk girls” on my resume? TSM.
- Vodka treats me better than he ever did. TSM.
- Always drunk, never in love. TSM.
- “She had a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.” -Kate Spade. TSM.
- “Hi. We’ve met seven times, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sober.” TSM.
- Passive aggressively withholding Instagram likes. TSM.
- Deleting drunk texts so sober you doesn’t have to relive the shame. TSM.
- Getting slightly depressed watching your tan fade. TSM.
- “Yes, I’m wearing shorts.” TSM.
- Patiently waiting for legging season. TSM.
- Calculating what you need on the final to pass the class is an essential part of the studying process. TSM.
- Life in leggings. TSM.
- I have a seat in hell with my monogram on it. TSM.
- Is it possible to be the love of your own life? Because same. TSM.
- I wish my life was as organized as my planner. TSM.
- Stalking yourself on Insta after someone follows you just to see what they see. TSM.
- He’s my ex-whatever-he-was. TSM.
- High GPA. High tolerance. High maintenance. TSM.
- Knowing your Instagram caption before the event. TSM.
- I’d wish him the best, but he already had it. TSM.
- I’m reaaaallly sorry, but could you take one more? TSM. .
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