Columns

TSM FAIL FRIDAY: Popping a Squat

Ten real TSM submissions, five photos and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Be there soon… with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs. TSM.
–California

Your desperation just got you promoted to slampiece number 2! Congrats!

Walking around the library for 20 minutes, and asking the front desk lady 3 different times where to find the vending machine. TSM.
–California

Maybe that was a sign you didn’t need any more Cheetos, honey.

Having sex with a fratboy and promptly accepting an invitation from someone else to his date party. TSM.
–Maine

That bad, huh?

Wearing rainboots even when the weather is perfect. TSM.
–Iowa

Umm…why?

Giving him a BJ after he took me to BJ’s for dinner. TSM
–Texas

The real problem here is that he took you to BJ’s for dinner.

When a sister gets hit by a car and the only thing she is worried about is her Vera Bradley bag that she was holding. TSM
–Texas

If your life is flashing before your eyes, and a shit designer like Vera Bradley is the only thing you’re thinking about, I feel sorry for you.

Responding “fratulous!” when asked how you’re doing.
–Pennsylvania

I hope whomever you said that to you immediately punched you in the face upon receiving your response.

Being named after a car. TSM.
–Tennessee

Ohh, so when your parents say “I love my Mercedes” they’re not lying. Smart.

Spilling vodka on your bid card. TSM
–Anonymous

Yeah, it’s not like it’s important or anything.

Making my fratdaddy take my tampon out and eat my bloody pussy, then leave him hanging. TSM.
–Tennessee

Your fratdaddy is a lucky, lucky man.


The wrong way to put yourself out there.


UGGGHHHHHH I hate you.


One of these ladies not like the others.


Kissy face!


She’s such a lady.

This alleged Kappa Delta thinks Jeremy Lin (who she calls Jerry) is a black player on the Super Bowl winning Giants, and invites him to her formal:

Love,
TSM Intern

Email this to a friend

94 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account

Show Comments

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take TSM with you. Get

New Stories

Load More