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UCO’s ADPi Date Party Theme Is “Homeless”

Homeless Party

My favorite theme party in college was probably Seven Deadly Sins. Unlike every other girl who went as “Vanity” or “Lust,” I thought long and hard about what other costumes I could wear, but still be practically naked. “Wrath,” obviously. Basically, I wore red, and embellished my costume with some glittery fire. I felt pretty good about it.

Since then, I’ve been to many a theme party: Anything But Clothes, GI Joes and Barbie Hos, Heaven and Hell, Around the World–which I think is probably illegal now. The common trend throughout? Use as little fabric as possible. So, no doubt, I was faced with a little bit of confusion this morning when someone sent us photos highlighting the Central Oklahoma ADPis who chose “Rags” as the theme for their date function.

How do you go to an event as a “Slutty Hobo?” That’s called a prostitute, and I don’t think it’s flattering. I could understand if maybe they were mixing with a fraternity they didn’t care about and wanted “to have fun with it,” but these girls invited guys whose texts they’d presumably been overanalyzing for at least one week and at most two months. These are guys who they are trying–to no avail–to date, or at the very least have sex with. At least, those were the attendees at my sorority’s date functions, anyway. The worst way to get a guy to have sex with you is to slap on a mustache (trust me, I’m Italian) and dirt isn’t sexy on anyone.

Ridiculous theme or not, the photos are pretty hilarious. And I can respect a girl who does funny over sexy.

***UPDATE***

I’ve gotten word that this was a two-day formal event, “Rags to Riches.” Day one was rags, and the day of actual formal was riches. Makes it even funnier if you ask me.

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Homeless

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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