Laughter is the best medicine, and wine helps you get there, so basically this is like herbal tea. TSM.

Finishing the round of shots before the check even comes back. TSM.

Banking on marrying a man with the same last name initial as you so you don’t have to change your monogram. TSM.

The drunk pictures after a night out are the highlight of my hangover ridden morning. TSM.

You know you’re a mess when your phone autocorrects drunk to drunj. TSTC.

My big is my spirit animal. TSM.

It hardly counts as a sorority event if no one cried. TSTC.

Covering last night’s fading bar stamp with tonight’s fresh one. TSM.

I’ll drink responsibly when there’s a brand of vodka called “Responsibly.” TSM.