But first, let me take a Snapchat. TSM.

Marry for money. Love will come later. TSM.

Having an ever-growing collection of single earrings you refuse to get rid of. TSM.

Stalking your little back to the day she joined Facebook. TSTC.

Having to start every party story with “I don’t actually remember any of this, but apparently…” TSM.

“Whatever. She only gets 25 likes on her Insta posts.” TSM.