“He seems like an asshole, but he’s a nice guy if you get to know him.” TFM. “She seems like a sweetheart, but she can be a bitch if you get to know her.” TSM.

Always matching your koozie to your outfit. TSM.

Forgetting where you came from, literally. How did I get here? TSM.

The unspoken race to get the pink ball when you go mini-golfing. TSM.

Only wearing pants when you don’t feel like shaving your legs. TSM.

All autumn everything. TSM.

Using the government shutdown as an excuse to get down. TSM.

Signing emails to your dad “Your Princess.” TSM.

“She should’ve filtered that.” TSM.

Sending sub-tweets that are so indecipherable even you aren’t sure who you’re attacking. TSM.