Blonde hair, black heart, pink everything else. TSM.

Finding your underwear from last night in your purse at brunch. TSM.

Dressing like a homeless person for class, but like a cute one. TSM.

“What time do you want to get there? It starts at 10.”
“11.” TSM.

I smell like social smoking and vodka. TSTC.

Being more excited about the pregame and the breakfast the next day than the actual party. TSM.

Getting paid in Vyvanse. TSTC.

When standards adds a bylaw and you’re just like, “@ me next time.” TSTC.

I don’t have a drinking problem. Standards has a problem with me drinking. TSM.

I’d rather be the risk than manage it. TSM.