Putting Barbie band-aids on blisters you got from wearing new 4-inch heels during a weekend in Europe. TSM.

No geed, I don’t have your 4.0 that you slaved over in your ratty sweats. But I do have the ability to effortlessly turn into every male’s greatest fantasy when I put on my reading glasses. TSM.

Sitting in class in norts and a frat tee, reading this website and pretending not to know the busted legacy in my sorority sitting two rows down. TSM.

Broke it off with my Northern fratpiece. My Daddy’s bird dog had better manners. TSM.

laugh all you want GDI but my date’s pants were not salmon, they were Nantucket Red. TSM.

$200 heels are for downtown, not football games. In the south we pregame wearing $500 custom made Cowboy boots with our initials engraved on the side. TSM.