Wondering if you can smoke Nutella. TSM.

Switching to vodka cranberry, because you have a UTI. TSM.

Being able to get away with anything on your 21st birthday. TSM.

Every cloud has a silver lining, and every hangover has a stomach lining. TSM.

Waking up in last night’s clothes and being both impressed with your outfit selection and disappointed that nobody took it off you. TSM.

Being offended when someone asks if your boobs are fake, even though they are. TSM.

Holding a wine bottle like it’s a baby, because it’s what you care about most in the world. TSM.

Mentally dividing your friends into two categories: “in a relationship,” and “fun.” TSM.

Being unsure whether you lost your voice to sorority recruitment or a fraternity bender. TSM.

Having a sex toy party as an underground sisterhood event. TSM.