Even my dog is designer. TSM.

If I want my house to smell like cookies, I bake cookies. I don’t light a candle. TSM.

I don’t pay less than $28 for gym shorts. TSM.

I don’t have to wear slutty outfits to get a fratdaddy’s attention. I’m a blonde. TSM.

I don’t dye my hair or starve myself to stay thin. I don’ t look down upon lower tier sororities. I’m not getting my MRS degree but an MBA instead. I can make a fantastic sandwich, award winning cupcakes and unbutton an Oxford and khakis with one hand. TSM.

Getting nightmares about having to choose between being rich and being skinny. TSM.

Selling Adderall is for classless GDIs, I gave Adderall to my sisters in Christmas themed goody bags. TSM.

Can’t wait to see which of my sisters got fat over break. TSM.