Getting “yell at the bouncer for not accepting your Panera card as an acceptable form of photo ID” drunk. TSM.

Checking yourself out in every reflective surface you see including windows, car doors, and other people’s sunglasses. TSM.

Hating the whole fraternity because of him. TSM.

Vodka is my hobby. TSM.

“I already thought of an Instagram caption. Of course I’m going.” TSM.