Kim is a whore, but her wedding still made me cry. TSM.

Judging myself for late night texting decisions. TSM.

Replacing the word “cowboy” with “frat boy” when singing country songs so that they are more relevant to your life. TSM.

Ugly people scare me. TSM.

Can’t I just be a cuddlepiece with t-shirt privileges? TSM.

Little girl, huge SUV. TSM.

The boys can have their freshman girls, we just got a new crop of law students. TSM.

People frequently question whether I have pants on. TSM.

Celebrating my big’s 21st as though it were mine, because it kind of is. TSM.

Dreading the time of year when I have to start wearing pants. TSM.