A person’s taste in music is a great indicator of who they are as a person. Like for example, if a girl in your pledge class loves TSwift, she’s probably a psycho who dots her “I’s” with hearts and keeps a shoebox full of used condoms under her bed.
The same principle applies to that guy in your stats class who keeps eye fucking you. If you’re not really sure if you should invite him over to Netflix and chill just yet, locate his Spotify activity ASAP (or if you’re like any reasonable bitch I know, you already have it bookmarked along with his Facebook, Insta, and LinkedIn accounts. You know, for like research). I’ve done the real dirty work for you, so scroll through and match that shit up.
1. EDM
If the neon snapbacks and aggressively small tank tops were not enough of an indication, this guy is a grade A dick. This is the type of guy who goes to EDC with “the bros,” drops acid, and ends up banging a girl with a dreamcatcher tattoo and an aggressive form of herpes.
2. Rap
Either incredibly or moderately douchey. This is the guy who bumps Migos and Gucci nonstop at the tailgate, but repeatedly locks the doors of his Tahoe the second he enters the shadier side of town. He’ll also drunk text you at 3 in the morning and call you a hoe if you don’t respond immediately. Add an extra 100 points to the douche scale if he listens to G-Eazy or, God forbid, Mac Miller.
3. Country
Sure, he may open your door for you every now and then, but do you really want to have to go to every Florida Georgia Line concert?
4. Alternative
Okay, so I actually had to Google alternative top charts to see what I’m dealing with here and two words: Linkin Park. This reminds me of a former fuckboy, name withheld to protect the shitty, who would pick me up from my freshman dorm blaring god-awful metal/screamo shit that dried up my vagina instantly. Maybe not exactly high on the douche scale, but also not totally normal.
If his music choices are a mix of the above, he’s probably really normal. Which, for guys, doesn’t exactly guarantee that he hasn’t already fucked half your pledge class and your house mother, so Netflix and chill at your own risk..
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