I Lost My Morals In A Cabin


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The summer before freshmen year was a magical time that can be described as basically one big emotional mess. It is the very definition of bittersweet. On one side, the excitement was all-consuming. Moving to a new city with unlimited and unimaginable adventures was all we could think about. Suddenly, words like “major,” “sorority,” and “dorm” stopped being just words, but instead became heavy with promises of so much more. Being so close the best four years of our lives made us impatient.

But on the other side, “goodbye” suddenly had a sense of permanence to it that had never been there before. We realized all that there was to say goodbye to. Leaving our families, dogs, friends, favorite restaurants, and hangouts was painful. The tradeoff seemed cruel, but ultimately we knew the heartache was worth it.

With this in mind, I had made a personal pledge to have the best summer possible before embarking on the next chapter of my life. I’m proud to say I had achieved my goal. One of the most memorable events, however, was my friend’s birthday weekend in Big Bear.

Her parents had graciously lent us their cabin, and we turned it into a house of sin. After promising my father that yes, her parents were going to be there (they weren’t) and that no, boys would not be invited (they were), we set off. The drive itself was only a few hours long, and we made the time fly by blasting 7th grade jams. The birthday girl, Allison, had only invited a few people along for the entire weekend, but everyone else for the actual party. Our group included her, Michelle, Amanda, Matt and myself. I was ecstatic, these were the most “IDGAF” people I knew and a good time was inevitable.

The first two days were filled with booze, random boys, and a series of off-roading trips. And the night of the real party finally arrived. We pregamed with wine because we’re classy AF. But soon switched to Smirnoff because, well, you win some you lose some.

I was personally embarrassingly drunk by the time people started arriving and I was not slowing down. I heard my friend, Natalie, pull into the driveway and I ran outside to greet her. Her car window was open so naturally I tried to superman dive inside. I failed. Instead, I fucking clotheslined myself like the idiot I am. Unfazed, I screamed my welcome directly into her face.

“Ew, get out, bitch. You smell like an alcoholic,” she responded.

All of a sudden, the cabin was filled with morally corrupt teenagers having the time of their lives. Every elevated surface was being danced on. Body shots were being done in the kitchen. Guys were having a smoke sesh around the dining room table. Girls were giving lap dances in the living room. And random hookups were happening in the bedrooms and hot tub. Everyone was excitedly discussing the upcoming semester while crying about how much they would miss all of us. All of this. There was no parents, no rules, no fucks to give, and we took full advantages.

The next morning was fucking brutal. I didn’t fully remember how I had gotten to bed, but was happy to find I had made it back to my bedroom. I was less happy, however, to feel someone sleeping next to me. Timidly, I rolled over. Relief washed over me when I discovered Natalie passed out on the bed next to me. I woke her up.

“Hey, I’m really glad it’s you, but like, why are you in my bed?”

“Some guy tried to say that you had invited him in here after you had passed out so I kicked him out and stayed in here with you,” she responded, groggily.

“Good shit. Thanks.” I hoped that I would find friends as good as her at my new home.

We made our way to the kitchen and found our friends looking miserable and the house absolutely trashed. Amanda made her way downstairs and announced that she had spent the night with one of the random boys. When we asked for details, she said:
“I mean, he asked me to put my finger in his asshole.”

*Total silence*

“And I did. But overall I’d say it was decent.” She shrugged.

And just like that, I knew we were ready.

Blondie excels at being an underachiever. She is currently trying to add an extra year onto her undergrad so she can continue to down $7 bottles of wine in an environment that encourages her erratic behavior. After graduation, she has big plans to flunk out of a prestigious law school. Email her compliments and Netflix suggestions at blue.eyed.blondie.tsm@gmail.com

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