Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 48 hours, you know that Kim exposed Taylor for being a lying snake on her Snapchat a few days ago. You also know that with a lengthy Instagram post, Taylor failed tried desperately to save her name — and apparently her character — from going down in the history books with other liars like Richard Nixon or Kylie Jenner when she said she didn’t get lip fillers (still love you Ky). In Taylor’s response, she stated, “I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of, since 2009.”
I am here to tell you is that this line is perfect to use to avoid any annoying and uncomfortable personal questions that may come your way from anyone you bump into on your summer break — distant relatives, exes, nosy people from high school, your new boss, etc. I have compiled 13 of these questions that you may be asked and now have an answer for.
- What are you doing after college?
- Do you think college has prepared you for the real world?
- Do you know where you want to live after you graduate?
- Your parents miss you! Are you going to move back home?
- Do you go out much when you’re at school?
- Are you remembering to eat your fruits and veggies while you’re away?
- You look tired. Do you get enough sleep during the school year?
- Did you make the Dean’s List this year?
- Where are you working this summer?
- When are you going to bring a boy home?
- Whatever happened to that cute boy you were seeing last spring?
- *at 2 a.m.* wyd?
- Don’t you think you’ve already had enough wine tonight?
And the answer to all of them: “I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of, since 2009.”
Sometimes biting your tongue when someone asks you rude or pointed questions can be difficult and yelling, “mind your own business, bitch” at Great Aunt Ruth is generally frowned upon. Put this line in your arsenal and never worry about awkward questions ever again. If Taylor has done nothing else this summer (which she literally hasn’t since she’s been globetrotting with her new boy), she has at least prepared you for the worst.
Now you can excuse yourself from narratives regarding your lack of life direction, compulsive Netflix binges, patterns of sleeping through class, and late night drunken Taco Bell runs. Thanks, Tay!.
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