There’s a good chance right now that if you’re reading this article, you’ve been called basic at some point in your life. A few years ago, when the term first gained popularity, you would think of a “basic” as someone wearing leggings, UGGs, something obnoxiously pink and probably in line for Starbucks. However, just like us and our judgement, the phrase has evolved over the years. Now, you might be quickly dubbed as a “basic bitch” if you’re simply in dark washed jeans, a plain white t-shirt, Stan Smiths… and still in that same damn Starbucks line.
Some people take it as an insult. Personally, I own it. I revel in the stares of slight disgust that I get as I walk my chihuahua in my sorority’s letters and talk to Becky on the phone about where we should go to get “vegan bowls that still taste good.” If you’re going to call me “basic” simply based off of the clothes that I wear, my interests and the fact that I just really f*cking enjoy some açaí than so be it; and if you’re going to tack the word “bitch” onto the end of it, realize that I see that as nothing short of a compliment.
If you’re anything like me, MAC Cosmetics has made the perfect palette for you. Called the “Basic Bitch” palette, this is a makeup lover’s dream.. or at least a dream for the girl who called herself a beauty guru because she owns more than one Naked palette. MAC Senior Artist Netta Szekely debuted the palette for the first time at the Milan Fashion. It contains plum-toned eight shades, and looks perfect for you to create that ride-or-die smokey eye that totally helps you get free vodka crans at the club.
The shade names do not disappoint either:
Shy Girl: For the girl who complains that her shyness is the reason she doesn’t have a boyfriend. Even though we all know shy is just another word for boring.
Tattle-Tale: For the bitch who screenshots your drunken snapchats, and sends the evidence to standards.
Me Me Me: For the girl who claims she’ll die without attention; and so “for health reasons” steals it away from everyone else.
Hell in Heels: For your idiot friend who insists on wearing the most impractical shoes and then whines the whole night, making your night hell.
Ms. Personality: For the girl who claims the guy she went home with last night was truly interested in the charity work her sorority does and wasn’t just staring at her boobs the whole time.
Big White Lie: For the girl who justifies all of the fibs that she tells from whether she thinks your boyfriend “who’s just really nice” is good-looking (she didn’t want to hurt your feeling) to where your new shoes went (she didn’t want to give them back).
Text Me Later: For the girl who “can’t handle this right now,” and swears that she’ll resolve the issue via text and then never texts you back, but is somehow still Snapchatting!
Game Player: For the girl who likes to brag about her roster of guys, but then gets upset when she sees that Boy #4 commented on another girl’s Facebook picture.
Love This Bitch: For the girl who acts like you’re best friends for the night simply because your outfit doesn’t clash with hers, and she wants cute pictures. Bonus points if her caption is “Love This Bitch,” and she doesn’t follow you on Instagram. It’s a ballsy move.
So what are you waiting for? You know that you’re not only going to buy, use and love this palette, but it will make for a fantastic picture with a self deprecating caption (that will show everyone that you’re just so funny)..
Nice Move146
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crazygirlfriend
Hiding from my mother and standards, both of whom would disown me if they heard most of these stories. Aspiring law school student, with a chihuahua named Bruiser and a head of unnatural blonde hair. Email me your "crazy" stories or any mixed drink recipes that taste like juice, but have copious amounts of vodka in them at crazygirlfriend.tsm@gmail.com Watch the bitch behind these stories at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vrp2D9h3SMk&t=67s
@amanda_h_jones
@amanda_h_jones
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