Smirking to stop yourself from saying something bitchy. TSM.

The eye roll becoming a reflex. TSM.

Being able to shower, do your hair, pick out an outfit, and put on makeup blacked out. TSM.

“No, it’s fine. You can’t get drunk if there’s no koozie.” TSM.

Knowing the difference between glitter and sparkles. TSM.

Drinking a bottle of wine like it’s a bottle of water. TSM.

Getting the president to drop a pledge because he stood you up. TSM.

Inexplicably changing your Twitter name to Elle Woods every time you’re drunk. TSM.

Party girls don’t get hurt. TSM.

“Who do you think will be the first girl in our pledge class to get married?” TSM.

Wearing letters to bed, so you have an excuse not to hook up with your boyfriend. TSTC.

My calorie tracking app needs a “midnight drunk meal” option. TSM.

“Oh my God. You’re such a sorority girl.” TSM.

Sprinkles are edible glitter. TSM.

Feeling personally victimized when your favorite fraternity is on probation. TSM.

“Ha…that’s cute.” TSM.

Being the most interesting woman in the world. TSM.

“Do we like her?” TSM.

Being more upset about losing the shirt than losing the guy. TSTC.

Never having to tell your boyfriend to change his clothes. TSM.