I bet on the Packers, he bet on the Steelers. Looks like my fratdaddy is making me a sandwich for once. TSM.

Sympathizing with Regina George. TSM.

We can always tell who is showering because everyone has monogrammed towels. TSM.

A random girl sat next to me in class today so I pulled up Lilly Pulitzer on my iPhone 4 and started to shop just so she would know I am better than her. TSM.

I thought that single-handedly stealing a fraternity’s composite for my Big’s 21st birthday couldn’t get any better, until the chapter’s President gave me props for doing so. TSM.

Working this silly little job at Fox News until I find a wealthy enough husband. TSM.

Sitting in the back row of Feminism class, online shopping for lingerie to wear for my fratdaddy this weekend. TSM.

Ignoring the twenty five minute time limit on the ellipticals at the Rec. TSM.

Being thoroughly ashamed at all the anti-football TSMs because true sorostitutes watch, understand, and enjoy football with their fratdaddies. And take care of all that comes with the tradition. TSM.

Never changed a lightbulb. TSM.

Having closets full of clothes and still having “nothing to wear” syndrome. TSM.

There is a fine line between “want” and “need.” I cross it often. TSM.

I’m one-hundred percent capable of opening doors for myself and pumping my own gas, I’ve just never had to. TSM.

While you temporary slampieces are living in your kitchens making sandwiches, my fratstar boyfriend is taking me out to dinner at a five star restaurant. TSM.

Braiding my sisters hair and singing softly while she’s hunched over the toilet. TSM.

Had a sisterhood to get brazilians. TSM.

My grandparents were invited to Princess Diana’s wedding. TSM.

I wish Lilly had iPad cases. TSM.

Not owning fat jeans, since I never have a fat day. TSM.

Oh legacies…bless your hearts. TSM.