I would cut “Ke$ha” the first day of rush. TSM.

Checking Facebook on my iPhone while doing crunches. TSM.

Drunk at a jewelry party. TSM.

Being born with it. TSM.

Boys hold the door open for me and let it slam in the face of the ugly girl behind me. TSM.

Bribing teachers with baked goods. TSM.

Number of pictures I’m tagged in > Number of calories I consume daily. TSM.

Convincing my mom that a hot pink leather Kate Spade planner is essential to my collegiate success. TSM.

Woke up with a koozie in my bra. TSM.

I never had a rebellious phase because I always got everything I wanted. TSM.

My favorite stress management techniques are baking and ironing. TSM.

Spending all night baking cookies, making cards and decorating a box to send for Valentines Day to my frat daddy in Afghanistan. TSM.

“Is this seat taken?” Yes geed, by my oversized Longchamp bag. TSM.

My Fratdaddy was studying for the LSATs when I was studying for the SATs. TSM.

Waking up naked in a guy’s bed thinking “oh no” then breathing a sigh of relief when a top-tier’s fraternity letters are all over his wall. TSM.

Parents asked me about graduate school. I had to remind them that it didn’t matter, I’m engaged. TSM.

Our Seaside Cottage is named Sweet Tea. TSM.

“Ok now a picture with just us…” TSM.

Unlimited tanning bed packages. TSM.

Every Kiss might begin with Kay, but every Wedding begins with Winston. TSM.