Not to sound like every old person that’s ever stumbled across a computer, but what the eff is wrong with our generation? With all the social media trends we’ve witnessed, being a “stan” has got to be the most nauseating. Not that this is a new phenomena or anything, but that’s the point. Being a stan *should* have been a fad. A short-lived fad. But people are still doing it. It’s annoying as all hell and it needs to end now.
It was funny when T Swift got attacked by snake emojis. It was heartwarming when people threw comments of support to Miley when she found her new sound. But, like, that should be the end of it. It’s time to get obsessed with your own lives and the people who actually know you exist.
Don’t get me wrong, I am totally Kardashian Krazy, but it comes with a limit. I will watch the show, I will like their Insta posts, I will always explain to boys they have the wrong opinions about who is the best sister, but I will never get into a comment battle because some troll called Kim trashy. And, more importantly, I would never troll some other celeb for her.
Stans are out here putting more effort into having celeb’s backs than they do with the people they have real life relationships with. As if Beyoncé is going to respond to y’all like “oh em gee, THANKS bae! I know I can always count on you for support! <3" No. It's not going to happen. You know who will notice your like? Your new boyfriend’s old fuck buddy. Go fuck her morning up. Trust me, it’s a much more productive use of your time.
The only time it’s okay to be a stan is when your best friend/sister/puppy is having a bad day and they desperately need a pick me up. They will actually appreciate your efforts and you will be doing at least a little good in the world. Other than that, the only time it’s okay to be a stan is when you’re any guy literally ever @ me. Like, can you believe that there is so much attention being thrown out, and hardly any of it is being used on me?! Not to be dramatic, but my pseudo hasn’t texted me in nearly two hours and I might quite literally die.
For the rest of y’all, I get it’s none of my business how you spend your free time. Except that I have to look at it every time I go on Instagram, YouTube, Twitter, etc. and therefore it affects me negatively. I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life, but imagine how great it would be to do literally anything else. For instance, call your mother back for the first time in two months. Or like follow me on Twitter because I have ah-mazing takes. Actually watch the video instead of getting upset that a troll is out there being a troll. Submit an entry writing piece for collegiate comedy website, Total Sorority Move. Hey, if you absolutely NEED to talk about your pop culture obsessions, you might as well get paid for it..
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Blue-eyed-blondie
Blondie excels at being an underachiever. She is currently trying to add an extra year onto her undergrad so she can continue to down $7 bottles of wine in an environment that encourages her erratic behavior. After graduation, she has big plans to flunk out of a prestigious law school. Email her compliments and Netflix suggestions at blue.eyed.blondie.tsm@gmail.com EDIT** if you suggest Black Mirror she's already seen it. So stop suggesting it. Seriously. Please stop suggesting it.
@Blondie_tsm
