The media has tried to convince us that a whole slew of people have gotten up close and personal with Kendall Jenner. While most of them seem pretty unlikely, pop culture slaves such as myself routinely become obsessed with the possibility of a new celebrity relationship to agonize over. Was she dating the Biebs? Is she dating A$AP? Why can’t she take a page out of her little sister’s handbook and just let whoever she is dating write a song about eating her out? You know, just to clear the air. Seriously, this amount of detective work is annoying.
There are many theories on why Kendall keeps her private life so, well, private. Some say it’s because she’s so fucking boring in every other aspect of her life, she doesn’t want to let the world know her dating life is no different. Especially when compared to literally everyone else in her family. I mean, Kris accidentally gave rob love pills when she was trying to spice things up with then Bruce. Can you imagine the storyline for Kendall? *Kendall talks in a soft, monotoned voice and doesn’t get her boyfriend’s joke. Again.*
Another theory, that I think is far more likely, is that she is straight up gay, which for a part-time lesbian like me, is fabulous news. Kendall hasn’t exactly come out of the closet (yet), but the evidence is all there. First thing’s first, she’s the only person in her family who isn’t obsessed with dick. Kendall is inarguably one of the most beautiful women in the world, yet she never seems to have a man. And sure, it’s possible that she’s just “really into her career,” but I don’t buy it. She never confirms or denies any dating rumors — which frankly, is pretty fucking gay. Better to let people believe what they want and spin their own stories to distract from what’s really going on. Kylie’s actually been quoted saying that Kendall never gets that into boys, but gets super into her friends. You know, her super hot also Victoria’s Secret supermodel friends. Which brings me to my next point…
For a time, her number one BFF was Cara Delevingne, a well-known scissor sister. The pair spent every waking moment together and had their own little celeb couple name #CaKe, and suddenly, out of nowhere, they were never photographed together again. Some say this was over a difference of opinion on a collaboration the two were working on, but a good, old-fashioned breakup seems just as likely to me. From there, she became obsessed with Gigi and now…
I know a photo at Pride with the girl she’s most recently been obsessed with doesn’t prove anything. But it also doesn’t not prove anything, ya know?
The most recent clue comes from another former rumored flame, Tyler the Creator. Back in August 2016, Jenner took to Twitter and jokingly addressed rumors that the pair were ~more than friends~ and Tyler came in HOT with his response.
Sure, this might mean nothing. But if Tyler’s new album tells us anything, it’s that he is actually gay. I Ain’t Got Time includes lyrics that have led to more discussion of the rapper’s sexuality, particularly “Next line I’ll have ’em like woah, I’ve been kissing white boys since 2004.” This in conjunction with multiple tweets that suggest homosexuality have people wondering.
Suddenly that Kendall joke doesn’t quite seem like a joke any more. I really do hope Kendall comes out of the closet if she really does swing that way. Maybe if she’s a little more true to herself, she’ll develop a personality. It worked for Kristen Stewart..
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Blue-eyed-blondie
Blondie excels at being an underachiever. She is currently trying to add an extra year onto her undergrad so she can continue to down $7 bottles of wine in an environment that encourages her erratic behavior. After graduation, she has big plans to flunk out of a prestigious law school. Email her compliments and Netflix suggestions at blue.eyed.blondie.tsm@gmail.com EDIT** if you suggest Black Mirror she's already seen it. So stop suggesting it. Seriously. Please stop suggesting it.
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