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TSM Writers Talk About Why They Love Working For TSM

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If you haven’t submitted a column to TSM yet, wyd???? We’re hiring freelance writers right now, and so in preparation for the new pledge class writers, we’ve asked our current staff and freelance team to tell us why they love working for TSM, besides the obvious benefit of dolla dolla bills.

“I’m in it for the fame and fortune.” –Srat Bro

“I’m just here to infiltrate the system and put myself on TFM girls tbh. Trynna be the next Carter Cruise. Kidding, I love writing for TSM because I read TSM in high school (sorry not sorry) and really respected these hilariously cool girls who put everything out there for the world to see, and now I get to see them in action, which is dope.” – Blue-eyed-blondie

“I prove you don’t have to be like Taylor Swift to put your ex-boyfriend on blast to the entire world, shares and retweets are cheaper for my self-esteem than therapy, and I have something to say when a guy asks me on a first date what my hobbies are beyond sitting and eating.” –Drunk but not in love

“I love that it’s totally normal and not at all inappropriate for me to sign my work emails with “Spank you.” Also I Gchatted with my boss about pubes for a solid twenty minutes yesterday.” – Lucky Jo

“It’s another way for me to spend time on the internet without feeding my online shopping addiction, but more importantly I can subliminally tell my friends how to live their lives without coming off as a bitch.” -Blackout_B

“I get paid to make fun of myself and other people, which is basically my hobby. I also talk about penises a lot which is always fun because I’m immature.” – Kellie Stritz

“The money I make allows me to drink mid-shelf liquor and wine as opposed to vlad.” – Champagne Showers

“I write for TSM because deep down we’re all Regina George. Plus I just like having an outlet for all my bitchy *feelings.*” – Shannon Layne

“I get to tell people how to live their lives without having to deal with the repercussions if my advice actually sucks.” –totalsistermove

“I like writing for TSM because I’m an anonymous online writer who shames people, so I’m basically Gossip Girl. Minus the wealth, lifestyle, hot guys, and drama. You know you love me.” – PSLsandPearls

“I get to pitch my most embarrassing/skanky life moments with zero judgment. And I get to put guys who’ve wronged me on blast without them knowing it’s me muahahahaha.” – PlattyBlonde

“I love writing for TSM because it’s a way to build up my Twitter followers without having to post pictures of my boobs.” –2NOTBrokeGirls

“It gives me a chance to say all the bitchy things that go through my head on a daily basis out loud.. and boys think it’s hot.” – Blonde_boozy

“So I can trick people into thinking I’m cool and important.” –Rachel Page

“I get the chance to share important experiences, like getting cheated on or having an eating disorder one day, and then talk about sarcastic sex positions and blow jay tips (my advice? Just don’t do it) the next day. Plus, I usually get at least 5-10 new Instagram followers every day and isn’t that what life is all about?” – Rachel Varina

“I love writing about things that really matter, like how women should stop giving head if they’re not getting head in return and what your dick preference says about you. I really feel like I’m making a difference in the world. JK, I do it for the laughs. And the paycheck.” – Cristina Montemayor

Remember to go over the rules and guidelines before submitting a column so you know what we’re looking for.

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