“Her brows are so on point.” TSM.

Sometimes, I just want to punch drunk me in the face. TSM.

Remembering just enough of the night to know you’ll be getting called to standards. TSM.

“Oh my God, same.” TSM.

Counting down to your 21st birthday the minute you turn 20. TSM.

The number of times I’ve used a guy because his bed was closer than mine is both epic and appalling. TSM.

Sisterhood is forever. So is mod podge. TSM.

I’ve begun using shot glasses as my contact containers if you want to make conducting the Hot Mess Express a competition. TSTC.