Fraternities giving you rush yoga pants. TSM.

Alumnae telling you they were the alcoholic chapter back then, too. TSM.

Why be their sweetheart when you can be their queen? TSM.

Having a “boyfriend” in every house. TSTC.

When your sisters have seen you naked more times than he has. TSM.

Tricking new members into believing you’re the president. TSM.

A moment of silence for all the cute shit you’ve lost at a frat house. TSM.

Taking a shot for every person in the room who’s shattered an iPhone. TSM.

Firmly believing that you cannot be held accountable for actions you don’t remember. TSM.

Being a boss bitch, not a basic one. TSM.